pokershow

We shall resist

2009-06-09T10:44:00.000-07:00

the poker bug is getting stronger by the day.I do not know for how long i can resist it.

After a complete break from all things poker,I have recently been checking out blogs and forums.Reading about the success of others has made me realise why I fell in love with poker in the first place.It was the academic and strategic aspects of poker that seduced me.Trying to stay calm and controlling my emotions added to this orgasmic intellectual stimulation.

Why did it all go wrong?

DAMN-i thought my brain was all clear and rationally thinking again.It isn't.foooook ..I ain't ready to come back yet.

'we shall resist..............................
........................................................' W.CHURCHILL

preparation

2009-05-31T14:20:00.000-07:00

I have been catching up with a few of my favourite poker blogs today.It's amazing how quickly poker takes hold of me.Immediately excitement sets in,anticipation grows and adrenaline starts to pump.All this despite me having no intention of playing poker for a while.
This has made me realise that i need to prepare for my return.I MUST REMEMBER THAT I WAS A LOSING PLAYER.What changes do i need to make?I think i should start with buying a few books, and studying, concepts and strategies.
-watch succesfull players

Still around

2009-05-25T13:35:00.000-07:00

QUICK UPDATE

I am not down and out.

Just putting my energy into my business,and towards creating a more balanced and happy life.My confidence is growing,and my character and personality is beginning to blossom.At this stage,I cannot risk being consumed by poker again.
Depending on how things go,I will probably return to the felt in 4-8 weeks.

Hope 'Joppa' and 'Would be' are doing good.

the recovery begins

2009-02-18T13:52:00.000-08:00

The soul searching that was brought on by getting busted..........

-I have joined a local book/social club.Actually I joined about a year ago,but never bothered attending any meetings ,or followed their reading suggestions.
'The marvelous life of Edgar Mint', is the book that will be discussed for the next month.I will purchase it on Friday,when I will be in the city centre taking my daughter to the cinema.
Often I have read a great book and not been able to discuss it with anyone in my current social network -I tell you this is very very annoying.Reading,educating and learning is not something that is appreciated by anyone I know -atleast no efforts are made anyway.

It will be a few days yet before I recover from the last few days' stressfull events.My brain is in no state to partake in any intellectual activity.Looking back,I have only ever had time for reading,when I have been in a happy stage of life.

As for poker.....
£20-£30 rakeback due for next week.I will probably deposit £50 on friday/sat.
No plans.No targets.
I'll see how the initial stages of adding abit of balance to my life will effect(or affect) my poker.

BUSTO

2009-02-16T14:37:00.001-08:00

As the title suggests I have busted my roll.For my own benefit I will give an explanation-something I hope will help me for the future.

Even though I have had more than a week of consecutive winning days,I have been feeling slightly depressed for the last few days.Winning at the poker table has not filled any vacuum in my miserable life.I must point out that I realised this a few days ago,before I actually busted.

So for the last couple of days playing poker as just been something to do.I haven't really pursued any of my interest in the las few years ,and partake in no hobbies or activities.Poker just fills up the hours.

I busted my roll playing $200plo.Playing at this limit,I loved the excitement,the risk of going bust,the adrenaline flowing -hands shaking,heart beating....waiting to see the next card drop.Did I win ........ did I lose. THIS IS SO MUCH FUN

.......but what is this fun a replacement for? This is the crux of the matter.

What good has come from this last episode then?

Well,I have learnt that I can play winning poker.The prerequisite for continued winning poker is a happy balanced life.This is where my effort and energies are more urgently needed.Frankly,playing winning poker is no longer my ambition in life.I have other ambitions to pursue.I better get started on them.

...the poker will continue by the way

lucky

2009-02-15T13:29:00.000-08:00

Having withdrawn £400 I left myself with a roll of £530
I have got to admit to myself that I have been playing badly all day today.I guess that when I get good results, higher expectancy levels coupled with greed, leads to bad play.This is something I need to overcome.
I have been playing a very loose aggressive style on 4 tables of £50nlh.Again I need to accept that 4 tabling is not yet within my scope -in future i will stick to 3 tabling.
Fortunately I sucked out in one pot(£112) to leave me with a role of £457.£73 down for the day,but it could have been worse.I basically reraised allin with flush & gutshot draw against pp QQ.Putting villain on AK, I was lucky to catch the gutshot on the river.

Probably one more torny tonight.I am not in the right frame of mind to play good tonight.

bankroll £457 (£400 withdrawn)

abit later........

Entered 1 mtt,and got my buyin back.Some winnings at $100nlh to take roll to
£517

down but not out

2009-02-15T08:00:00.000-08:00

Just had a bad session of play.4 tabled $50 nlh and have lost £80 over a 90 minute period.The 'chase' mentality was starting to set enough,and I was not enjoying the game.Fortunately I have managed to drag myself away from the tables.I will have a break now and return later in the evening, when I am a bit more refreshed.
I cannot really multitable 4 tables that well.My PC is infected with so much shite;it is currently running in 'safe mode',which does not allow any sound.This is very awkward,as i miss out on audial prompts.I think i need a new PC.

Looking forward to play in the £2.5k added mtt,with a buyin of £25.Got a good feeling about this one.I better get a nourishing meal in me before it starts at 6pm.

8 days,still no busto

2009-02-14T12:22:00.000-08:00

Just had 1hr session of $50nlh and £20nlh.3 tabled at a time and have made a profit of £50 to take my roll to £854.
I have been thinking about my sudden improvement at poker.Some may say it is just luck.I simply put it down to better discipline -three types of discipline that is.Firstly,the discipline of sticking to bankroll management.Secondly,the discipline to only play when in a good state of mind.Thirdly,giving up on pots,that I should not be involved in, on the turn and river.'Money saved is money earned' is the motto here.
There are many tests I still need to pass,before considering myself as a potential longterm winner.The key test would be to come back from a 10 buyin downswing ,without tilting or allowing my emotions to get the better of me.Not preying for a downswing,but I will have to face one eventually.I just hope I can cope with it.
I play PLO and NLH.Which game i play depends on my mental and emotional state.I cannot put my finger on why,but ,I have of late, been able to choose to play the game more intune with my being at any give moment.Tonight for instance I felt more relaxed playing NLH,and stuck with it.

bankroll £854

just had my second session for the evening.It only lasted 10 mins and has made me another £50 ish .Joined a $50nlh,and got dealt KK,AK(3times),AQ,10's,JJ ,in the first few hands.I raised everytime to 4-5bb,hoping that villains would think I was bluffing.I got called lite by a shortstacker and walked away with $90,after joining with $35.
Meanwhile,at the $25 plo,I joined with $20 and walked of with $50.I bet out trips,got called all streets by a flush draw,which missed.

Hit and Run is working for me at the moment.I cannot keep much interest once I have a big stack.I seem to play better with a shorter stack,looking to build up.

Goodnight all.I will sleep soundly tonight.

WOW managed to last 1 week & no busto

2009-02-13T14:49:00.000-08:00

Playing into the early hours for the last few days has messed up my body clock and eating patterns.As I have to be up for 8:30am,it is very difficult to get through my working day.Sitting in a shop,with few customers coming through the doors,it gets very difficult not to fall asleep.
It is doubley annoying as all the best poker action in the evenings,and if you run deep in a mtt,then you are usually taken past midnight.
So this evenings session started at 8pm and i finished at 10:30pm.I played mostly $25 plo.As there was a long wait to get onto a second table ,I decided to join $50 plo.There were two bigstacks(to my left) and three shorties.The big stack to my immediate left was a LAG,and was involved in some big pots with the other big stack to his left.
I was down 2 buyins quickly,before getting my stack upto $120.Another decent pot won and I was upto $170.At this stage I thought about leaving,but decided to go 1 more round.I had conciously decided to play a very tight round,and walk away with atleast $150.
I flopped a set of 3's on 743 board(2 suited).The turn filled me up;raise reraise etc...
I fired out on turn and got called by a flush and won a $280 pot.

My roll is now at £776.

I have just realised that I have manged to last a full week without reloading.I think this has only ever happened once before.The £1k mark is very close now.I would love to get there by just playing cash games.It would be such a great psychological boost.With rake back and bonuses due,my roll is effectively about £830.
I have set Tuesday as my target for reaching £1k,although i will most likely do it by Sunday.

Good luck all,enjoy the good times.

benefits of BRM is finally appreciated

2009-02-12T15:47:00.000-08:00

Last night I went into a semi tilt mode in my second session of play.It was a 3-4 hour session , ending at 3 am -well past my bedtime.I was playing a hyper aggressive game,raising almost every hand,and firing out most flops.Thankfully I stuck to $25PLO and walked away with a loss of £50,to leave a roll of £620.
As the English cricketers often say,'I must take the positives from a poor performance and come back stronger'. So,here is my list of positives:
-I stuck to BRM.
-I accepted a £50 loss for a badly paid session -feeling no anger,or desire to recoup losses quickly and erratically
-earned plenty of rakeback, and got closer to a bonus pay out.

Today I have played a total of 90 mins of poker.Two tabling $50 nlh.It has been a winning session,even though I felt uncomfortable most of the time.I was just so worried about losing and tilting off money again. I suppose it was due to all those bad past experiences embedded deep in my subconcious,brought to the forefront of my mind.

BANKROLL £684

can't think of title

2009-02-11T13:26:00.000-08:00

After recieving £11 in rakeback my bankroll stood at £670 when I started this evenings session of play.I did not play any poker yesterday as I was not in the right state of mind.

Anyway I felt confident that I would not tilt tonight and likely to take a break if I lost £100.Encouraged by this I decided to enter just the 1 mtt to start of with.Ten minutes into the torny I was feeling very confident,positive and enjoying the game like I used to.No stress,no tension,just mental stimulation.
I decided to enter another mtt and played the two simutaneously.I can't remember how I went out in the first mtt,but I am sure it was something to do with my self percieved over inflated poker player status.
I went out of the second mtt after making a move that I thought was good.I had just made a note about the villain-'Ace chaser',(someone who fishes for an Ace on any missed flop).I wont give hand history.The villain slow played trip 5's on a draw heavy board.

Despite early exits in the mtt,I decide to play some cash games.I started of playing two tables,then 20mins later opened a third.Played 2 tables of $50nlh , and single £20nlh 6max.
Again my decision to open a third table was due to my confidence in not getting into tilt mode.

I started of winning a few hands,before going down two buyins.I remained composed and won two big pots to take my roll back to £670.
Both big pots were well played by me.It was the same villain on both occassions.A loose aggressive player.His play was very similar to mine,when I am in a slight tiltish mood.I therfore found it easy to put him on hands and encouraged him to bluff into me, for the first big pot, by showing weakness.
The second pot,he was bb I was button.I raised 4bb ,he reraised to 10bb.I call.
I was thinking... he has suited connecters 78ish or small pp,and is afraid of any picture cards on the board.If there are any picture cards on the board,and he fires pot,then he is definately afraid and is trying to rep premium cards .
The flop came A K 9.He fires potsize bet.I miniraised with A J.He flat calls.
The turn is a blank.He has 1 potsize bet left,but fires half the pot.I reraise to put him all in.
He calls with 55.
River is a blank,and I take a $100+ pot.

Watching abit of football now.Due to return to poker if the all important mental situo is good.

Winning but AFRAID

2009-02-10T11:27:00.000-08:00

As mentioned in the previous post I won two tournaments in 2 days.My bankroll is standing at £609 (+ rake back due),after making an initial deposit of £50 on saturday.

So many times in the past I have made a quick £400-500 only to lose it just as quick.The downslide normally starts with me moving upto $200 nlh with only 5 buyins : $25nlh begins to feel like peanuts.I may initially win more,but I get 'married' to my new increased bankroll,and cannot psychologically deal with any slight downswing.I begin to chase losses with ,what can only be described as, a drug fueled urgency.

I then get punched flat in the nose by the reality of going broke (usually at 4am).Little sleep for the night ,before dragging myself out of bed at 8am feeling like shit.

The week that follows going bust is like that of a drug addict getting together as much money as possible to feed his addiction.I start to neglect my duties and responsobilities and become very unsociable.

OK, I won't continue with the misery ....
you can now understand why I feel so anxious about starting my next session of poker -some deep psychological scars

Anyways I hope things change.This honest blog post is,I hope,indicative of my readiness to change.

2 tornies taken down

2009-02-09T17:44:00.000-08:00

Quick update

made £600 profit in last 3 days.Took down a torny for £509 and another for $79;plus some winnings at PLO.
It's been about a year since my last win
Need to get to sleep now-no doubt will dream about my genius plays .

I feel so great.

REALITY CHECK

2009-02-02T14:23:00.000-08:00

The recession is starting to take it's toll.If the current trends continue I could possibly be forced into winding down my business within three months.The first step for me is to cut back on my business expenses.I could do this by changing my business model and stop renting a storage unit that costs me £800 per month.
Anyway,if the worst was to happen, I would have to find an alternative source of income quickly.Despite being a losing poker player I cannot help but think of poker as a potential source of income.Prehaps if I find myself in a desperate situation -when the need to play winning poker would become an absolute necessity -I could manage to keep a strict discipline,the lack of which is the reason why I am a losing poker player.

I HOPE SO
(if the worst was to happen)

developing the right mindset

2009-02-01T07:19:00.000-08:00

2 tabled $25 PLO for about an hour for a profit of £15. I decided to leave the first table -with $60,I had about half the total money in play.4 players had less than $10,and the other player had $50.
At the other table I left with $40.Again 4 players had about $10 and one had $30.In both cases the players with decent stacks were decent tight players.

Towards the end of this session of poker I became abit confused about my state of mind.I seemed to have a strong gut feeling that I was very close to going into tilt mode.Maybe it is because I am underrolled and have become less risk averse.Or, is it my subconscious recalling of past experiences -where I start with a winning session, only to get bored and starting giving action,playing lose and tilting off my roll.

Any way I am pleased with myself for managing to drag my arse away from poker when not in the best frame of mind.I will give it a bit of thought and return later in the evening to play £10 nlh and use £15 to enter mtts-if i feel upto it.

ROLL £115

2009 starts now for me

2009-01-31T15:58:00.000-08:00

After almost a month off ,I started with £70 today and have finished my first 4hr session of play with £100.
I made an effort to make a plan on what games and levels to play-and stick to bankroll management.
The plan was to invest £10 in mtts,with the remaining £60 to be used to play £10nlh -buying in for £6.Any winnings would be used to finance further mtts and a shots at $25PLO.
I mostly stuck to the plan.Played 2 mtts and busted early.I took a shot at PLO when my roll was at £50.Manged to win £30 single tabling for about an hour to boost my roll to £80.At the same time I closed a £10nlh table with £20 cash.
Although I broke my bankroll rules,I felt confident that I would not tilt and would have the discipline to walk away if I lost a buyin.Also I made an effort to play a low variance style to minimze risk of loss.

NOTES TO SELF

-Close any tables that do not offer good chance of winning money-consider stack sizes,position,aggression factors ,and fish in making the decision to leave table.
-2/3 weeks of winning £20-£30 daily will get me to about £500.Enough to take a bit out for a treat.
-Play suited connectors less often

break

2009-01-12T15:09:00.000-08:00

Opened our second shop at the start of January.As a result I have not had anytime to play poker.All the stock buying and setting up of the shop display has me working well past 9 pm most days.I will take the rest of January off and concentrate on building up the business.

Another reason for taking a break is to read up on the Jewish/Zionist/Palestinian issues.I have been deeply effected by the suffering of the Palestinians and would like to be more educated and informed about the issues.I have always been interested in global politics and regret dropping out from University before the end of the first term.

Wish you all well.

P.S

- i am not broke

reverse psychology? new reolution

2008-12-30T15:06:00.000-08:00

I do not see the point of making a set of new years resolutions just for poker.Thinking about ones game and improving is naturally done through out the year anyway.
Instead I am going to motivate myself to be a successfull poker player in 2009 by writing an end of year review for 2009 a bit early.How I hope the year will go for me.

2009 poker review

January started of a bit slow for me due to my business commitments,however I managed to win a mtt for $300 halfway through.I continued to play a mix of PLO MTTS and NLH ,always when in a relaxed state of mind.
In Feburary I moved over to pokerstars with a roll of $500.Ground out the cash games to have the occassional shot at some of the $5ish mtts with big fields.Managed to cash in afew but nothing major.
March-JUNE -I really began to trust myself a bit more.I had more disciplined bankroll management.My first $1k+ mtt payout was well timed,and the thought of buying some luxury treat for myself from poker winnings was the best feeling ever.
SUMMER MONTHS- with my roll growing to nearly $4k I started to play mtts more regular and had my greatest payout ever,of $5k.This funded the purchase of a new car(or funded trip to LAS VEGAS)
OCTOBER-well I set myself a target of $12k profit for the year and was more than halfway there.

'I think i will complete the remaining part in april-may'

ROLL UP ROLL UP

2008-12-30T10:49:00.000-08:00

Started with a bankroll of £50 ($72).I used a new payment method which stars did not except so used my old unused ladbrokes account.Let me tell you ladbrokes is a load of crap.You only have a fixed table sizes to choose from.When minimized they dont make it easy to follow the action,big up info like stack sizes,where the button is etc.
Anyway registered for $4 mtt.I managed to get to the break with no buyins or add ons in 2nd place.I finished in9th place for $23.Glad to be in the money,but dissapointed at not being higher up the pay ladder-courtesy of one badly played hand from UTG. J 10 suited looks really pretty.
Mentally exhausted after 3hrs of tournament play I surprisingly felt refreshed afte 30mins of break-sooner than i thought i would.I then made my way to a couple $20nlh tables,buying in for $15. Profit about $15 after 30mins of play.
Justed busted in a freeroll tournament,whilst writing this.Involved in another one at the moment.That will be my last piece of action for tonight.

On a side note eating loads of junk food and ssmoking more than usuall is really diminishing
my already limited concentration timespan.
Taking the kid to the Chinese state circus tomorrow.It will be the first time for both of us.

Glad tidings.Wish you all a happy new year.And may you spiritually empty punks remember the sufferings of the Palestinians in your prayers.

staked-thanks to yorkie

2008-12-26T05:02:00.000-08:00

last couple of days i have playing some freerolls at stars with the usual 5-10k runners.No luck there.Find it abit difficult to be reading up on razz,stud hi/lo, whilst playing the game at the same time.To be honest, at time i wasnt sure which rules applied to which game.
Anyway,today there is a decent freeroll of $1k on willhill.I feel confident about this one.Hpefully the field wil not exceed 1500.

Other news is that I have been staked in the 500k world record mtt by evertonyorkie(blog link to the left).My initial feeling is that of gratitude.I hope to return some kind of favour back.Thats my nature.I dont think yorkie will go busto for a while,as i get the impression he has good bankroll management.Plus a $7k win helps.I am thinking if and when i have my first big win ($1k +) I will offer to stake or part stake him for a bigger mtt-something like a $100-$200 buyin.Just to help him enter a mtt his bankroll management dictates he should not.That is aside from the 50/50 split on winnings for this 500k mtt.

$1000 freeroll 850 runners.first hand I limp call 3bb raise with 22.Flopped set.Flush draw on board.I value bet all streets to take my stack to 2000.
My AJ raise from lp gets reraised allin by sb.I pass.
Very next hand.3 limpers I raise 4bb with JJ.Villain from bb reraises allin again.I know I should call.Putting villain on middle pair or less likely AK AJ etc. I call, villain catches 10 to make set.I busto.
I now the field is weak in these freeroll mtts.My plan was to avoid allin coin flips until the field narrowed. My call was correct.I guess feeling the disappointment of going out early should not
in any way make me think of playing more cautiously. So with a bit of huff and puff I will hold my head high -continue to make the correct play.The money will no doubt follow soon

varience

2008-12-24T09:26:00.000-08:00

Over the last few days of reading blogs and forums I am finally starting to absorb good information from them. Varience,and its significance regarding my game, is something i have a greater understanding of now. Varience is no longer... "yeah,..um.. just the ups and downs of poker". Varience is relevant to one's particular style of poker. My LAG style is very high varience,which is a problem -as I am usually under rolled ,investing 20-50% of my roll into a buyin most of the time. Add to this my results orientated mind - you see why i go BUSTO.

Notwithstanding, the 20 buyin rule ; realising I control variance by choosing the style of poker I play leads to other benefits.I am now thinking of the longer term.I now make plays that are correct and will make money in the longterm -'So what if I lose this pot right now'. Understanding and accepting variance unshackles the grip of fear.It reduces onset of tilt.
Take variance further - control it more.What about position? Yes that should be factored in. Should i call a 4-bet with my pocketpair 77? Well what does variance say? The odds of hitting a set on are 1 in 8. Pot odds?...............here you go another factor

Understand variance and it leads to an allround improvement of your game

HELP! discuss hand

2008-12-21T13:28:00.000-08:00

Played a couple of freerolls today.Busted early in one. Cant remember how i was out. The second freeroll was a supersat for £35k sunday mtt. 400+ runners. I played really well here -putting into practice moves/strategies I have been thinking about. I felt so much better and more controlled, when I was thinking about my actions and what outcome i hoped for.With a big stack I asked questions rather than bully/bluff -something which I did in the past.I thought about future actions and the anticipated pot size.I took into account opponent stack sizes.All this combined together allowed me to accumulate chips with minimum risk.

With 30 players left I was hovering in top 5 chipstacks.Top 5 getting a seat.
I busted in 28th position.Prior to this I had noticed that the 2 bigstacks were playing a LAG style(calling reraises for 2/3rd stacks).With only 5 seats up for grabs I realised there will be a lot of crazy allins as we got closer to bubble.This encouraged me to be more aggressive preflop,with premium hands at an earlier stage, before tightening up with 15 or so players to go.The following hand busted me.

BLINDS 600/1200
hero sb AK 30k chips

utg raises allin 10k
button (35k) calls 10k
hero reraise allin 30k
button calls 20k with KQ

board J,3,4,10,A

I think my play was correct.But i want to concentrate on my thought process.

My logic was that I was at worst taking a 50/50 shot.Taking this gamble early and winning the pot would have allowed me to sit and wait into the top 5 without getting involved in too many more pots.
Is this flawed logic? Was I subconsciously more ready to bust earlier rather than dealing with the greater disappointment of busting closer to the buuble.
Please leave your comments.

LIKE MAKING LOVE TO A WOMAN

2008-12-21T07:52:00.000-08:00

Indicative of spending the last few days of me giving my poker game some serious thought and analysis,last night was the most enjoyable for a long time. I had a beautifull sleep and dreamt of poker all night long. I made it into numerous final tables. Every time i turned over,another table opened up.I made moves,won big pots,gave verbal and had a repost for everything.It was heaven.

FEELING BETTER

2008-12-20T15:00:00.000-08:00

I played about 5 freerolls and pokerpoints mtts.Won a super sattelite to get a seat into £5 sat,in which top 50 got ticket into £20k sundat mtt.Most disappointed with missing out on the BWCOOP.Early on i pik up kk in sb.Raised 5bb from late position.I reraise to 10bb.Villain all in with AJ. I call. board q 10 9 8 ?.I was crippled but had 600 chips(20bb).I tangle with the same villian with A4 against his A5 to bust.
Been watching replays of sunday poker million final table.It should help me in future tornies.
Overall i feel good today.I have learnt a lot about the game and seriously thought about my game and sorting out the leaks.Actually despite being broke i feel like a champion.I have a feeling of confidence.I feel assured that i will not go broke again.I will not repeat mistakes.

SAME OLD SAME OLD

2008-12-19T09:54:00.000-08:00

In the shits again.Acquired myself £100 to deposit into poker account.Unfortunatelies I donates its all too Willhills vias the roulette machines. I think its about time I be honest with myself and accept reality.I am a lifelong gambler wanting to become a poker player (yes there is a distinction).
Fortunately i have never had much to lose.More important than money is the wasted opportunities that result from gambling.From family,friends,career,relationships,experiences,education,business,confidence everything has suffered and continues to do so.
In other aspects of my life I am considered an honest and fair man.My advice is always valued by those who know me.I am considered an intelligent and openminded person.

Thats enough for today.I dont seek sympathy.I am not depressed.I just fear one day i will be.

P.S -
freerolls until i get back some rakeback on tuesday.Ive got 231 mpp at will hill.Anyone got a rough idea how much that will be in rakeback.

BUST

2008-12-18T14:47:00.000-08:00

BUST-no need to explain everything again.
One interesting hand in HH mtt.Very first hand i pick up AA on button.Utg raises 4bb.5 callers.I repop allin.2 callers holding KK 44.Board 44K9Q.

START AGAIN

2008-12-18T05:38:00.000-08:00

deposited another £90 this morning.Played 2tables $25 plo.Managed to get bankroll to £120 after an hours play.Off to work in abit.I'll have a go at a couple of stts whilst i wait for the taxi-due in 30mins

BANKROLL £120 NET-£150

advice please

2008-12-17T12:23:00.000-08:00

i would appreciate some advise from you fellow low level players.
I will briefly outline my habits and what i think are the reasons for me going bust again and again.
-i play 2 tables PLO or NLH upto $50
-I reload anything from £20-£100 at irregular intervals.
-Most of the time I win the first day or two of playing 4-5hrs of poker.
-Rarely do i not go bust before 3-4 days.
Why?-boredom-inflated perception of my ability(esp after winning start)-Ego-Tilt-Fooling myself into believing I am making good moves,when actually tilting-Frustration/impatients resulting in putting all my roll into 1 buyin at a higher level.
I seem to play better when slightly detatched and not trying to spot moves and bluffs ,with over eagerness.

Possible soution

Invest in Poker software.Invest in a double screen PC.Move to a bigger site like stars.Multitable(4-8) and just play a detatched simple TAG style of poker.

BUST

2008-12-17T06:59:00.000-08:00

Finished work early today.Logged onto site and was waiting to play $25PLO.After 10 minutes of waiting decide to buy into $50PLO with $25.Within 5 minutes I was upto $65.Thought about leaving the table but desperatley wanted to catch a LAG fish.Got my chance when I reraised fish with AsAcJsKc.He repopped and i went allin.Fish Q 6 9 A rainbow.Flop Q66.I quickly reloaded only to see fish sit out for next half hour.I got pissed and went on an hour long tilt.When down to about £65 ,i thought about taking a break, but lacked the disipline.I have now busted my entire bankroll.I need to address this problem I have with any downsing.I expect to increase my roll every time I sit at the table.I am just to constious of this.
O well I should get £5-£10 in rake back today.I shall use it to enter into 1 or 2 HHs.

BANKROLL-ZERO NET;-£60

grind feels so good?

2008-12-16T08:52:00.000-08:00

I got back from work early.Feeling abit lethargic i decided to check my emails before taking a nap.Couldnt resist playing poker whilst on the net.Not being in the best state of mind to play poker I still managed to win £30 two tabling $25 PLO for an hour.I am surprised by my continued relaxed/patient style of play.
Cup of tea and nap for me now-Caffeine has no effect on me.
Looking forward to some mtts in the evening.

BANKROLL-£88.Come to think of it,thats only a £28 profit.Felt like alot more.I guess thats- just steady grinding.

adios amigos.

5 HOURS LATER...

After having a power nap I enterd three HH tournaments.Busted early in the most expensive one-my silly moves dont work here.Again busted in the 2nd one.Atleast I think I did.I cant actually remember if I played 2 or 3 mtts.Went deep in third phantom mtt.Was hovering top 5 stacks with 50 to go.I just lost patience and made stupid moves,but collected £13 courtesy of 5 heads.Annoyed at this as I should be hanging on to finish as high as possible without taking risks.When I am rolled better I can play abit riskier once i beat the bubble.
Also made about £8 playing PLO for about 10 mins.
Bankroll £92
Have a rest.Play for 1hr.get to sleep by midnight.

MIDNIGHT...

Streched previous plan a little.Played for 2hrs.Started with £10 mtt.Was chip leader with 40 to go.Had 4 times average chips and should have made final table.I need to learn how to play better with a bigger stack.Just got caught making stupid moves.Every hand I played I hit flop good and got paid everytime.I knocked out about 6 players.This developed a feeling of invincibility,which led to my self destruction.It is the second time I have done this in recent weeks.
PLO-I played two tables and over a period of 90mins I doubled on both to take my bankroll to £114.

ANALYSIS FOR THE DAY.

Played 3 sessions lasting about 2hrs each,with plenty of rest in between.Apart from a couple of bad plays in the mtts,I only had one mini tilt on PLO.This tilt led to me being paid off at hand later on.As long as I stick to playing two hours at a time I should remain tilt/boredome free whilst playing.

BANKROLL-£114

rolling

2008-12-15T17:20:00.000-08:00

Deposited £60 today.Ignored all my planned bankroll discipline.Played 4 tornies for a total of £45 buyins.Lost set of 10s to rivered AAA in the £15buyin torny-top prize was £2kish over 200 runners.Lost the other three all by way of river making set for opponents.Although i finished 16/500+ in the £1.4k headhunter.Collected 11 heads and cashed £28 for a £3 buyin.

I recouped more money playing $25plo to finish the evening with a bankroll of £59.I seem to be enjoying Omaha at the moment.It keeps by brain active and i dont get bored and start daydreaming-like i do when playing micro nlh.I have developed a calm and relaxed style of playing.Being patient and setting traps for the fish.Its amazing how often the nutts gets paid when you pot bet river.

PLAN FOR NEXT PLAYING SESSION.

-Use £20-£30 for headhunter tornies.Definately play £1.4k for a £3 buyin.
-Open up omaha table if i go deep in mtt and likely to cash.
-play for 3hrs max,unless involved in mtt

Gonna watch some NFL now.Really into the game now.Its definately better than all the other american games

READ MY OWN BLOG

2008-12-14T05:53:00.000-08:00

The year is almost over.I started of as a lucky fish with a bankroll and am going to finish the year as a brokeass fish.I dont want to waste another year.So for the remainder of the year I will do some soulsearching alongside some researching.Any resolutions I make I will start implementing immediately,just so i can get into good habits-ready for 2009.Some preseason practice if you like.
After reading all my previous posts I have realised it is so wishywashy with no regular structure to it.No consistent goals, or attempts to stick at stated objectives etc.This accurately reflects my poker playing experience.

2009 HAS TO BE MY YEAR.

I need to set out my plans.Should I have a plan for the full year or should I do weekly/monthly plans.

getting motivated

2008-12-14T03:36:00.000-08:00

I just cannot keep my motivation to play at the micro levels for too long.My bankroll,usually about £40,should mean that I play £6 nlh.The money is just so insignificant.Winning £10 is a good session at this level;but this doesnt even buy you 40 B&H.
After a couple of hours of play I move up to $25nlh with most my stack.I then worry about busting out whilst playing and eventually go broke.
What should I do?
Should I wait until i get a £250 bankroll and start playinbg at the $25nlh level.Or should I make some realistic plans on how to manage my bankroll better and stick to £6nlh.
A possible plan would be as follows:
-Play £6nl ,two tabling for no more than 2 hours.Stop playing if I lose 3 buyins.Any winnings, I use to play $10 buyin tornies.
I think this is a plan that suits my psychology.It means that playing the micro levels has more purpose and the fruits of my labour have an immediate and a positive outcome.ie a free shot at a $10 torny-which run almost every hour.

P.S
I am going to add a chart listing all the tornies i enter by using winnings from £6nlh,aswell as keeping track of how much money I deposit into my account.

break

2008-12-11T11:10:00.000-08:00

I have decided to take acouple of days off.Playing too much poker gets me into an action hungry player.This usually results in loose play,quickly followed by tilt mode.My capacity to play poker, at a decent standard at the moment is about 2hrs and 2 tables at a time.This is not good enough to make me a profitable player.Prehaps i need to slow down abit.Make my style of poker abit tighter and less of an emotional roller coaster.

torny

2008-12-09T14:52:00.000-08:00

finished 41st in £3 headhunter torny tonight.569 runners £11 win for me.Played good tonight.Took abit longer to make decisions.Spotted most moves and generally avoided trouble.I had top 10 chipstack most of tourny.Couple of bad beats and the tourny is over.
I am gonna try my luck at omaha now.

QUICK UPDATE

2008-12-02T14:08:00.000-08:00

Been playing little poker last few months.Losing about £40 per month.Anyway the lack of poker is because of me valueing money abit more.
I opened a business 2 months ago.Looking to open a second outlet soon.I just hope i dont go on a gambling binge and bollocks it all up.

fatigue

2008-05-22T09:09:00.000-07:00

although i have a sufficient bankroll at the moment,i just cant get motivated to play.Is this just fatigue,which will go away after a weak or two of rest.Or is there something else to explain this lack of motivation.
Maybe i am too loose and play a gamblers style of poker instead of a more skillfull and thoughtfull one.Have i had enough of too many 50/50 races?Prehaps a tighter more controlling style of poker is what the doctor would prescribe.

Unrelated question-Thinking about the footballer Peter Beardsley scoring a goal and running away to celebrate, whilst totally oblivious of the erection he was carrying(presumably because of the euphoria of scoring).
Well naturally it occured to me whether there are any such experiences in the poker world.Could calling a big bluff on the river get you erect?

good poker

2008-04-21T15:28:00.002-07:00

been running really good,took a shot at $400nl holdem.Flopped trips 3 times in one round of blinds,doubled up everytime to walk away with $3k.I am going to break my previous bankroll rules,and will now multi-table at $200nl for a while.

£29500 to go

2008-04-21T15:28:00.001-07:00

hard at work,managed a couple of mtt top 3 finishes.
Glad to see the ball rolling in terms of paying of debt.Hopefully i will not have to reload for a long time now-thus allowing my poker 'side bankroll' to grow by £30 a week.

the journeys starts thursday

2008-04-21T15:28:00.000-07:00

Just a quick post to announce that i have managed to save £90 to start a small poker bankroll.With a bit of lose change lying around I should be able to muster £120 and make a deposit on thurs/fri.
The plan is to grind over the weekend and get to £500 by sunday/monday.

POKER GOAL

2008-04-06T10:46:00.002-07:00

As mentioned my target is to payoff £30k in 2 yrs.I will now set out a more detailed plan.

I consider poker a hobby.It is a hobby i am prepared to spend £30 a weak on(approx 10% of my income).To create the optimum mindset suiting my temprement and personality, I will not consider this weekly sum as an expense.My first goal is to grind myself to a playable bankroll.Once this is achieved I will no longer add £30 per week directly into my online account.Instead I will put it into a separate 'poker money' pot.

Everytime my inplay bankroll exceeds £500 by £250,I will withdraw this surplus £250 portions and deposit it into a savings account.I will consider this money as my poker winnings,and use it towards paying my debt off.
In the event my 'online bankroll' is busted,I will go into my 'poker money' pot.Hopefully this would have been given a chance to grow.

rolling again

2008-04-06T10:46:00.001-07:00

YEAH BABY ROLLING AGAIN-

Started with £15 , registered 2 mtt payouts to take my bankroll to £250.
Since i done so well at mtt,i decided to have a go at $20k guaranteed mtt.Had some serious bad luck to be knocked.Why the ffuck does luck desert me in the bigger mtts.

Some cash wins,to take my bankroll to £300.

I have decided to set myself a goal as regards my poker.Hopefully this will help me stay focused and grind away.The goal is to pay off £30k i owe my parents within 2yrs.Even if i pay of half that from poker winnings it would be a big bonus.

BOXING TIP-jab away ;jab,jab and jab until you find an opening.Then throw your power shots.

confession

2008-04-06T10:46:00.000-07:00

ok i hold my hands up.My posts have dried up recently because..u know,well actually....

OK OK IM BROOKUP.

shit man.what do i do now.I need to get myself together.Giving up poker is not a longterm option.

HERES THE FACTS.I can afford to add £30/week to a bankroll.I have about £10 due in rakeback on tuesday.I dont like playing freerolls.

just entred will hill freeroll.724 runners -top prize £52.thats good for freeroll.

boxing clever

2008-02-28T18:11:00.001-08:00

finished in the money in an mtt today.It was a £10 rebuy.I had just the one add on.finished 5/65 for £110.The levels changed at 6min intervals.I think for cash players like myself the 6 minute rounds are more preferable.
Earlier in the evening i had an hours session at the boxing gym.Is it just me or do most people suffer from an initial delusion that they have an exceptional talent at whatever new sport they try.I mean last year i started playing golf with a second hand golf setI bought for £25.Despite never scoring better than 7 over par ,me and my playing partner both convinced ourselves that it was an easy game and we could make it as pros.
With the boxing i again think that i have talent.I really want to try out a sparring session.To even get to this stage I would have to improve my stamina and definitely give up my 20 a day smoking habit.However I dont think i could give up smoking whilst playing poker.So i have a dilemma now.
I advise all you poker punks to learn how to fight,at the very least to put a stop to getting mugged by the hookers.So as of today i will try and give you punks any tips i get whilst boxing.
tip no1-always be in position to throw a punch.This means good footwork.
tip no2-avoid big black men

?

2008-02-28T18:11:00.000-08:00

I have returned from my self imposed exile from cyber space.

After a few months of playing online,playing at any hour of the day/night.Having no set routine,no eating /sleeping patterns.No time for family and friends.it left me in a state of emptyness.I started to ask myself great philosophical questions.What is life?etc....
Anyway, indicative of my great intellect i saw boxing as the solution.So i joined a boxing club.I also started practicing my cricket for the coming season.
Now most my evenings are filled with enjoyable real world activities I feel like a human again.I feel secure in the knowledge that the real world has reclaimed me. And now it is sending me as a war time emissary to the cyber world.
I DECLARE WAR on the soldiers of cyber space.My new fortified chips will bring destruction on your bankrolls.

how to play fish

2008-01-12T15:42:00.000-08:00

I want to know what is the best way to play fish.I was at a table today where there was 1 extra aggressive loose fish.Playing at $100nl,every time i raised a hand to $2,he would reraise it to $4.On the flop he would bet pot or go all in with his stack about $50.No way to bluff him.

3 HANDS

fish reraises me as normal.I go all in with AJs preflop.He calls with 75 and catches 6 on river for straight.Fish wins pot $100.
Fish reraises me as normal.3 way pot.sb bb(fish) and me.pot $12.Flop Qc3s2s.Sb bets pot bb reraise all in.I pass JJ.bb shows A3.fish shows 23.
fish raises preflop.I call with 9h7h.3 way pot,usual suspects.FLOP Kh6h7s.Pot $8.Fish bets all in $50.I instacall.Win pot with pair of 7s $120.Fish doesnt reload.

Did i make the right call,or should i have waited for a better spot.I feel it is worth calling donks like that with middle pair as long as i can improve my hand.When there is a fish at the table i dont like to become a rock player.I like to see flops with a wide range,knowing if i hit good i will get paid.

'a wise man knows not every post needs a proverb'

EASY POKER

2008-01-11T17:08:00.000-08:00

I've been playing at $100nl recently and have done really good.I have made about $700 in the last 2/3 days.It's so much more enjoyable playing at this level as i am always in control of my emotions.I tend to tilt quicker at $200nl.The only reason for this is that, with the bigger pots i tend to get excited and start pumping serious amounts of adrenalin.
The players at $100nl tend to be overcautious and fear getting outdrawn.It is so easy to make money at this level.But i know i am not improving my game much here.I have the bankroll to move up to the $200nl,and stay there for a while.I dont think it is wise to move up until I can psychologically deal with the bigger stakes.

'a calm sea does not make a skilled sailor'
proverb,my mate daves grandmother Edith

MTT

2008-01-09T13:23:00.000-08:00

Cummon you SPURS.

I hope they hold on to their lead.Holding on to the lead is something i have failed to do in the last 3 mtts i have been playing.I dont ususally play mtts so it is something i need to add to my reportoire.Just got knocked out of the last torny with 40players to go.I was 2nd chipleader with 60players to go.Doubled up a fish,who later knocked me out with A2 to my reraise allin with KK.
fOR FUCKS sake do you need to be mentally strong to deal with these bad beats in tornys

Played poker at my mates house yesterday.His 'know it all' brother has just got into poker and introduced me to poker last night,or so he thought.LoL,still laughing now thinking about it.I took him and another one of his mates for £65.The funny thing is they still think i am just a lucky fish,just like THEO WALCOTT 1-1

'those who dare not look ahead,remain behind'
persian proverb

dropping a level

2008-01-08T17:57:00.000-08:00

I had a bad run at the $200nl tables,down $1k.After a couple of bad beats and some draws not coming good I lost some confidence and became a loose passive player for a while.Now that i am trying to take the game seriously i am less aggressive.I dont know whether i am being more prudent,or just lack the heart to make aggressive moves when my instinct(usually correct)tells me someone is weak.
I will have to drop down to $100nl to develope my new style of play.

'courage is knowing what not to fear'
plato

POKER SONGS WHEN YOUR WINNING

2008-01-06T08:13:00.000-08:00

i had some reat sessions of poker the last couple of days.Making about $600 profit.
Recently i have noticed a new trait in my character When i am winning I break into singing out loud.And when i get some donk complaining in the chat box i respond in 3 different ways.I do this for a number of reasons:to annoy players.or just to display my happiness,to help create a loose image,or just to be funny.

I start typing famous catcphrases,or quotes-my favourite being 'he who dares rodders'.This usually amuses fellow uk players.
start thanking the poker gods.example-'oh poker gods,i than thee for showering me with your blessings'-'please lord forgive (name of player),for he knoweth not that he cannot lead astray your disciple'-if i make a bad call-'oh forgiveth me god for i have fallen into teptation'
type in song lyrics-

I would like to know what others do when they are winning.I mean online poker is a solitary experience.With all the tensions,adrenaline,emotions involved-how do these manifest themselves when you win.

POKER RANKINGS

2008-01-05T13:07:00.000-08:00

As i am browsing other poker blogs to learn a bit more about the game I have decided to add some of these poker blogs into 3 categories.

poker wannabes -players just starting out,or trying to build a bankroll to play seriously
poker minnows -decent but not great profit making players
poker stars -great poker players,high stakes winners? or bullshitters?

No offence is intended.If anyone chooses to query their ranking please leave a comment explaining why.

I will be visiting all of these blogs regularly and will be changing their rankings as need be.

If you have any suggestions for further ranking categories,please leave a comment

Greetings

2008-01-05T11:53:00.000-08:00

I have finally decided to start a blog.I dont know how long i will stick with it.Hopefully it will be a worthwhile consumer of my time.
I have been playing poker for a couple of months now.I aint no great mathmatician or a strategy expert.I am just a lucky bastard.
Playing NLH at $50 to $400 buyins ,I have made about £5000 in 2 months.It is mostly down to luck.Now i am addicted to poker.I wake up in the morning thinking of poker.I need to play everyday.And it has to be a profitable hobby.
I cannot continue playing in this gungho style of mine.I have to learn to play properly.Pot odds,strategy,bankroll etc have to be taken seriously now.
So this blog will hopefully be a vehicle by which i can learn and discuss the game of poker with others.